Above: Baldy man gardening this afternoon between showers
Having had an MRI scan on Monday along with almost a day of other checks the consultant phoned me to say that there was good news and bad news. The excised tumour, through 30 sessions of strong radiotherapy, has been at the very least stunned, and has even reduced a little. My liver. which reacted alarmingly badly to the trial drug, 10 weeks on has come back to normal. Just as well they had a healthy candidate or permanent damage could have occurred. The bad news is that there is an area to the front of the tumour which is either damaged or has fresh growth. Please pray that it is damage.
Another positive is that my weak left hand is gradually strengthening, my drooping eye has recovered and speech is better. Hair is growing back as well. Before this latest alarming news it was becoming easy to think that I could maybe lead a normal life again.
This week I joined the ranks of the disabled… picking up the parking badge. Previously I would look at people in these parking spaces and think, “not much wrong with you mate”. Now people seeing me stride through the car park will be annoyed. However if I suffer a seizure then it is a case of taking strong drugs and getting back to the car quickly, so, should I recover, I promise not to be so critical, the checks done prior to issue of the badge were rigorous. How grateful I am to live in a society where there is that care, concern and consideration for the most vulnerable (something I gave little or no thought to prior to my illness).
Despite faith, and to a degree resignation to the inevitable, the desire to live is as strong as it was on the day of the operation or making a daring cross wind landing in a rough remote airfield well beyond published guidelines for the tired machine. The question is will I ever be resigned to what Paul describes as ‘the last enemy‘? PROBABLY NOT. Death is not natural, not pleasant and of course awful for those left behind.
Jesus Christ sacrificed himself on the cross and rose triumphant over death on my behalf. What a great deal! a great Saviour to trust… A glorious message to share. This is either absolutely true or particularly nasty deception. As I have blogged before read your bible carefully and make the right decision.